You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost) by Felicia Day

I just finished listening to Felicia Day’s memoir. I expected it to be a fun read full of her quirky, geeky humor and stories, and a part of it was, but it took an intense turn that caught me off guard because it’s uncannily relatable.

Felicia writes as if she’s having a conversation with you. The dialog is brutally honest and open. The kind of deep conversation you only have with really close friends. Hearing about her childhood made me laugh. Hearing about her gaming days, and health issues were uncannily relatable. I felt frightened when I listened to her Gamer Gate tale, and while I didn’t share her experiences with Gamer Gate, the feelings she related about feeling unsafe, particularly about how the internet which was once this wonderful, beautiful thing that brought us all together is now a source of fear — thanks to how accessible it’s made things that were once private information publicly accessible. I dropped some tears and am still feeling a heavy flood of feels.

Felicia’s story seemed both unusual, but also far more normal than I imagined. I thought she’d had more success as an actor before creating The Guild. I had no idea she suffered from severe anxiety and depression, something I can relate to all too well. I had no idea she had a breakdown a few years ago, but even that I can relate to. If one were to change a few details at least half this memoir could be my own tale.

It made me feel good to see so much similarity in our lives. We both have very similar feelings about the internet. It opened up communities that made us feel connected. We both enjoyed some of the same games, but lost ourselves in them too much. I’m talking about you, Puzzle Pirates and World of Warcraft! Yo! Ho! Ho!

I’m currently struggling with a severe relapse of depression and anxiety. It’s been difficult to deal with, and has literally turned my world upside down due to it’s affect on me both mentally and physically. I was sad to hear she’s suffered as I’ve suffered but it’s inspiring to hear of a kindred spirit who’s been able to achieve so much success despite her afflictions. Her desire to delete herself from the internet, to avoid people, and even her suicidal ideation are both things I’m all too familiar with. The fear of exposure and of feeling unsafe in her own home and around people she once felt kindred also hit home. I share those same feelings due to my own tumultuous past.

All in all it was a very good read that made me question things in my own life, primarily my own unhealthy binging habits, and my inability to let go. It’s super geeky with tons of geek language so it’s definitely not for everyone, but I think it will hit home for those of us that do relate to this type of geek speak and life.

#puzzlepirates #worldofwarcraft #feels #nostalgia #goodread #books #feliciaday